We've all been there before. Camping in some distant jungle somewhere near Laos, when suddenly there the black and white devil is. Only in that moment when it's lunging for you do you realize all the monster wants is to get you (Did you know Panda's don't actually eat meat? When they kill other creatures including us, it's just for sport).
It's then you realize that nature's teddy bear (as the ignorant public wants so badly to believe), is nothing more than a wild monster prowling the jungle in search of a thrill.
ATTN: All panda haters, I am deep undercover trying to seek out the Panda stronghold. I am led to believe that their "endangered" status is merely a ploy, and that they're in fact trying to amass an army to conquer a city and establish their place as an intelligent race.
Be warned, the image you are about to see may shatter your will, and force you into the fetal position.
Warning: Do not allow your children to view this horrific display.
These Panda's are what people in the counter-intelligence sector call, Ninja's. They are masters of disguise, capable of blending in with whatever their surroundings just so happen to be. Nature tried to corrupt these soulless bastards, attempting to save us by bleaching their fur white and black... Unfortunately the Panda hive mind has discovered how to beat this. They portray themselves as wildlife. Cute, cuddly and almost like a stuffed animal. Of course their is one thing that can save you from falling victim to their trap. Their eyes. Those soulless beady little portals of evil. Remember my fellow PDS'ers the awwww's are what they are trying to illicit from you. Just so they can get you in close and rip your head off. -PDS
Alright, so I know it's been a while. As such I am going to be starting up my one-man crusade again, with a tiny bit of change.
This time I will be providing my own in-depth analysis to accompany the many videos that are spreading like wildfire.
I warn you though, while these videos seem cute and adorable. . .
They're actually something far more pervasive and sinister. Please, as you view these videos be sure to remember: Panda's are nature's liars.
Do you really believe a bear would eat only bamboo? Me either.
After some serious bad-news with people trying to hack my blog, as well as have it banned, I've finally got full control once again!
As for the people (or should I say malicious bears) who carried this out... Well you just wait! I'll get you.
In other news. Beware.
That's right. This infection we all know as the 'Panda' has spread to other countries. I know they hate us here in America... But maybe the Panda threat is something we can all get behind. Perhaps this will be what unites us as human beings.
Of course the Panda's are crafty, and some nut jobs out there will still defend them. But we all know those are the Panda's familiars. (If you're not familiar with what a familiar is... Get familiar with the term familiar. Cause it basically means Panda bitch.)